As a Warrior of sorts

I've never thought myself as a Warrior. As an Asatru-oriented pagan I often see myself at odds firstly because I'm Brazilian (and that's enough for some people abroad to claim I'm not supposed to be Asatruar) but mostly because I don't think I fit in this "warrior culture" mold that comes up with the Heathen Hammer.

Turned out I can see myself as a warrior of sorts. When I graduated I didn't make vows about fighting, but it turns out it is all about fighting, about enduring, about outthinking and outlasting, about never giving up. I am a teacher. I am not a marine, not a navy officer, not an unsung fireman or policeman, not a pilot. I can't even ride a bike.

But I took up a mantle of responsability many shared before and that now I share with countless many too. I realized that at some point in my journey I felt that it was up to me, as it must have been up to many alongside, to make a stand against this terrible monster, this terrible enemy. I picked up a fight not against a monster of myths, not against an enemy group, not against a foreign threat. I've chosen to fight ignorance, the mother of all monsters, and denounce it wherever I find it festering.

While I don't physically put myself to the test of blood and sweat, while I don't hear bullets and cuts, I do put myself to the test. I strive to endure, sometimes feeling all alone, against an overwhelming tide of ill news that show up that we are driving ourselves as a race towards disrepair and cataclysm. But I harbor hope and I don't give up, I try my best to remain sharp in mind and stalwart in heart. With each word and gesture, through my actions, I seek to make something good prevail amidst displays of ignorance beyond count.

Like many before me, like the many I stand among, and like many will do in days to come, I've chosen to fight trouble before it takes up a hideous form. I've chosen, perhaps, to dedicate a lifetime fighting ignorance, misinformation, intollerance, oppression... Evil lurking within in all its forms. I've chosen to take up a fight not against an enemy without, not against some enemy beyond, but against the enemy within.

That, I know, is a fight that can never be won, but must always be fought. I strive to be not one to give up. There can't be victory, or so it seems, so I will fight for as long as my nows come with the passing time.

There is a Hall far ahead where Warriors can drink, but there are many Halls more, and on some I think I might be welcome. Down here, far from the stars, it's easy to feel alone and ignored. But there are silent ties that bind us together with the Aloft ones, and I know I must speak because they hear.

I carry no cutting blade, I carry no projectiles to puncture flesh and bone, but I am not unnarmed. Wit and tongue and hand suffice for now.

And on this precise now I must rest, for tomorrow another sort-of-a-fight starts again. I can't lose ground. What I rallied must be thought. Ignorance stirs, but so do countless wills to lead our minds and hearts to prevail against it.

Skal!